I had forgotten what it feels like to start over. A new city, a new job, new home. When you feel kind of stuck where you're at and you're dreaming of being somewhere else, you can kind of idealize this somewhere else. The grass is always greener, you know.
I've only been in Portland for about a month, but I am very much having my ups and downs with it. Driving around sometimes feels rewarding because I think Wow, I actually know where I'm going! ... I didn't get lost! Then, it can be awful because there are so many aggressive drivers and, well, I get lost a lot!
Starting at a new job has been much harder than I had anticipated. I got so comfortable at my old bakery job that I thought I was over being shy/socially awkward/socially anxious. Well, news flash to self, I'm not. I guess it doesn't help that almost all the staff mainly speak spanish, and although I am half Puerto Rican, I do not look or speak the part. I almost quit the other day. I was really honest with my manager about how much my mistakes were bothering me and that I didn't really feel like I was fitting in with the team. He was so nice about it and really wants to help figure out a way to make me feel more comfortable. I'm really happy that I just said something because he was really understanding and it kind of snapped me back into reality of it not just being my fault that I've been feeling this way.
I'm going to try really hard in being more active about learning about this city and getting out and doing new things. I need to get myself out of this rut.
On a brighter note, let me share my Etsy Window Shopping for this week!
Drooling and double checking my bank account right now....
Labels: etsy, moving, new city, portland, shopping, vintage